Empower & Encourage

9 07, 2017

Our Interdependence on Independence Day & Everyday

In Celebration of the signing of the Declaration of Independence lets also remember how interdependent we are upon each other.   Our country’s independence from a foreign dictator could have never been accomplished without the unity of those fighting for that independence.    They were interdependent upon each other.

Thomas Paine famously wrote in “The American Crisis” pamphlet during the American Revolutionary War, “These are times that try men’s (and women’s) souls.”

Some say we are in a crucible in our nation.   If so, how will we as individuals, and how as a nation will we respond.

First, what is a crucible?  It’s a container where metals are melted, or subjected to very high temperatures.  In a human sense, some would call it a fiery trial, or the refiner’s fire where metal is tested.  A crucible, or fiery trial can be brief or prolonged.   It can produce something better, or something worse.  The result of the refiner’s fire, often depends on the metal being tested.

Simply put, a crucible is a place or situation that forces people to change or make difficult decisions; a place or situation where different elements interact to produce something new.

Scottish historian and award-winning author makes a very good point to consider, “The point needs to be made that all individuals ground their view of the world within some conception of moral authority.  Not only those who are (religious) in a traditional sense, but also those who claim to have no (religious) faith at all, base their views of the world in unprovable assumptions and ‘being’ and ‘knowledge’.”

Hunter goes on to say, “Within communities that hold orthodox views, moral authority arises from a common commitment to transcendence, by which I mean a dynamic reality that is independent of, prior to, and more powerful than [...]

20 01, 2017

L.I.F.E.V.I.C.T.O.R.Y.

I don’t know about you but I love word plays – words matter.

A couple of years ago I created a word finder game to help people have a greater understanding of what LifeVictory Coaching is about.   I’ve attached it here.   Have fun!  Click the link, download and print and play.   LIFEVICTORY WORD POWER SEARCH

I hope and pray that your upcoming 2025 is blessed.   If you feel stuck or without direction or focus, I’d love to help you get unstuck and help you find a sense of purpose in your life.   No matter what your past or current circumstances, you have a bright future.  It’s not a journey you are expected to walk alone.

Blessings,

Deborah

LifeVictory Coaching and Consulting

deborah@lifevictory.com

775-224-0717

Resilience Can Be Learned – Emotional Intelligence (EQ) Matters

Resilience – Are we ever in need of a HUGE dose of it about now.   The culture chaos all around us has so much to do with emotional intelligence (EQ), also known as Resilience.   

Researcher Daniel Goleman, in his groundbreaking brain and behavioral research shows a shift in how we see IQ and life success.

What is EQ, Resilience anyway?   Up until 2012, in my studies to become a Certified Life Coach, I had never heard the term before.   Was it ever eye opening and life changing to learn how much of a road block the lack of EQ (Emotional Intelligence), or Resilience can be in one’s life.

Emotional Intelligence includes self-awareness and impulse control, persistence, zeal or enthusiasm and self-motivation, empathy and social deftness or skillfulness, ability without difficulty.   The really good news is these all can be acquired.

In his book, Emotional Intelligence – Why It Can Matter More Than IQ, Dr. Goleman points out that the qualities I just listed above mark people who excel in real life: “whose intimate relationships flourish, who are stars in the workplace.  These are the hallmarks of character and self-displine, of altruism or selflessness and compassion – basic capacities needed if our society is to thrive.”

Why is emotional intelligence, resilience so important for right now as well as success moving forward?   Well, to put it right out there, the personal costs of deficits in emotional intelligence or resilience can range from problems in marriage and parenting to poor physical health.   “New research shows that chronic anger and anxiety create as great a health risk as chain smoking.”  Lack of emotional intelligence, or resilience can sabotage the intellect and ruin careers.  “Perhaps the greatest toll is on children, for whom risks include [...]

19 11, 2016

Reset Button – Words Lift Up & Words Tear Down – Lead in LOVE

Come together, right now….we need to agree to disagree in some cases.  At the end of the day, we need to consider the children of the future.   Protecting them and their innocence.

We must lead in LOVE. 

LifeVictory is thematic – The theme LEADS in LOVE, everything else is elementary and follows.

WORDS fitly spoken can heal…it is time to heal.

Join me in sharing words that heal.  

Peace,

Deborah

 

22 09, 2016

Thankfulness…Truth…Trust – September’s theme

As you’ve likely guess by now if you’ve read many of my blogs….I love words.   Words have the power to lift up and the power to tear down.

The truth matters in building trust.   

Love rejoices when the truth wins out!

“If you abide in My word, you are My disciples. And you shall know the truth and the truth will make you free.”                  – Jesus

Being thankful with a grateful heart.   Having an attitude of gratitude are live changing principles.   Neuroscience of the brain is proving that your brain is healthier in a state of gratitude.  It increases the endorphins in your brain.  And that’s the truth.  

As I mentioned earlier, truth matters in building trust.   If you’ve ever been in a relationship where your trust was violated or betrayed because the other person was not being truthful to you.   That person has to regain your trust by being honest & truthful to you.

Perhaps you are the one who has betrayed someone’s trust because you weren’t telling the truth.   You do not have to stay stuck there.  You can take responsibility for your actions, ask forgiveness and make the commitment to honesty and truth. 

#truthmatters

#trustmatters

#thankfulnessmatters

Speak the truth in love, Be thankful in all things, Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths in good ways.

Peace to You!

Deborah

 

 

 

 

Value Virtuous Vision

It is said that without a vision people perish!   I think that requires looking outside of ourselves, to something, or Someone far greater than ourselves.   Vision comes from a greater purpose firmly grounded and rooted in who we are and what we were created to be in the Image of God.  A vision, mission and purpose of our greatest and highest contribution to the world around us.   A vision to be a world changer, not just to suit ourselves, but to Be a World Changer Created in the Image of God.   That’s a vision outside of ourselves.  Thinking outside the box.

A vision that builds on virtue, a pursuit of excellence.  A form of bravery, strength, moral excellence and valor out of a sincere love for God, distinguised from religion.

Because, we value and give importance to the things God Values.  

We live in a world of great contrasts, to put it mildly.

Vision has a lot to do with faith.  But faith in what, or shall I say who?  We put a lot of faith and hope in a lot of people and things.   People and things that don’t bring us to a better place.   Not that they are not valuable, but we need to ask ourselves is this person or thing in our life helping us build on and greater vision and purpose for our lives.

Vision without God is void of clear purpose and clarity.   It’s like seeing life with the glass half empty instead of half full.  A life full of abundance, love, possibilities, and hope for a brighter future despite what we see in front of us.  Without vision we lose hope, which leads me back full circle to my first statement….without a vision people perish.  

If you are looking for vision, hope, purpose, a sense of knowing your true God given value and purpose (not matter what the world is telling you – [...]

1 06, 2016

Be Encouraged to Be Empowered to Encourage and Empower Others!

I just couldn’t let May 31st, 2016 end without another word of ENCOURAGEMENT to EMPOWER you!

It comes from my favorite book of all time.   This book has been a source of life and encouragement to me in some of my darkest and worse case scenarios.  Times I would not want to repeat!  EVER!

So, when I think of the wisdom and scope of God’s plan, I fall to my knees and pray to the Father, the Creator of everything in heaven and on earth.  I pray that from His glorious, unlimited resources He will give you mighty inner strength through His Holy Spirit.  And I pray that Christ will be more and more at home in your heart as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God’s marvelous LOVE.  And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high and how deep His LOVE really is.  May you experience the LOVE of Christ, though it is so great you will never full understand it.  Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God.

 

A Mother Ponders Mother’s Day…………..

Solemn Birthday my Sweet Guinevere Rose!

You would have been 35 years old this Mother’s Day had we said YES to the LIFE you were meant to LIVE.

Had we said YES to you and run fully into the arms of Papa God for forgiveness, instead we chose to continue along the path of lies and deception, deceiving ourselves and all around us, who could have helped us choose LIFE for you. The path into darkness grew for more than 2 decades….impacting every aspect of our marriage, parenting and our lives. We ignored the LIFE, and her impact, of our first child we chose to snuff out.
By the grace of God our marriage survived, hanging on by a thread….that thread was Jesus! Even though the church, the body of Christ, was all around us no one ever talked about the need to heal from abortion. Oh, maybe a short conversion, placing a little bandaid over the wound. In fact, abortion was rarely talked about….it was one of those taboo subjects….”too political” and “too divisive”! Such little understanding of how GOD WEPT over the brokenness He saw in His own children who were too busy “playing church” rather than BEING His church….
Yet, in our silence so many wounded and broken souls walked in and out of the doors of the church without a word to open the door, even a crack, to God’s healing grace from the deep soul wound of abortion trauma. Yes, the wound is deep, permeating every nook and cranny of one’s life. The open festering wound oozing, with it’s infectious poison, into every aspect of a woman’s life *spirit-soul-body* UNTIL one day, Oh bright and glorious day, the light of Jesus [...]

3 05, 2016

April Showers Bring May Flowers right? What else does May bring?

May does certainly bring glorious flowering beauty, there is no doubt about that!

But for some, the arrival of Mother’s Day brings with it a very mixed bag of emotions!  I know, I was one of those women.  On occasions it creeps up on me unexpectedly, like yesterday!  

I just felt “off” emotionally and physical the last couple of days.   It was a bit confusing, trying to figure out if I might have eaten something that just didn’t set in my stomach very well?   Maybe I hadn’t drank enough water that day?   Maybe I was catching a flu bug of some kind?  I began to pray and ask God (maybe that’s where I should have started in the first place 😉 ?

I asked God what was going on with me?   He knows me better than anyone else and He always tells me the truth and is straight up with me, no matter what.   He wants the best for me, He loves me and I can always count on Him to give me the straight scoop!   He leads me beside still waters.   He restores my soul.   He’s walked me through the valley of the shadow of death and I fear no one or no thing.   

So, as I quietly asked, pondered and waited for His reply, in His still small voice, He answered me…”remember when….Guinevere Rose would have been born?  I have healed your broken, shattered and wounded soul, yet you still carry the scar.   I have restored your confusion, I have renewed your mind, I have created a new thing….all sin is forgiven and you have been set free from your self-made prison.  Yet, the memories you do not forget my child, not completely. [...]

7 11, 2015

Resilience…..another word for Emotional Intelligence (EQ)

Resilience is your ability to bounce back in the midst of adversity and overcome the hurdles of life.  It measures your aptitude for social and emotional interactions and skills that are critical for life success.

Emotional and relational intelligence (ERQ) is being aware of, recognize and understand our own emotions – taking ownership of our own emotions.  As well as those of others around us, and being able to constructively manage our own emotions and how they relate to the relationships around us.

Did you know that ERQ has been found to be more important in the scope of life success than someone’s IQ?

I don’t know about you but that gives me hope.   You are born with your IQ, but your ERQ can be improved upon and changed – a skill to build upon.   That’s cool!

Self-Awareness (Me) is the first key – Emotional Self-Awareness, Emotional Expression, Accurate Self-Assessment build towards Self-Confidence.

Self-Management (I) is second – Emotional Self Control, Anger Management and Self-Responsible – in other words taking responsibility.

Relational Awareness (Us) is third – Relational Awareness has to do with Empathy towards others.  Noticing that someone is in pain.  Being present.  Knowing what “not” to say.  Recognizing emotions in others.

When it comes to Empathy, the secret is listening, not talking.   Learning to be a good listener builds your empathy towards others.

Relational Management (We) is fourth – It encompasses 7 simple steps of ERQ empowerment:

#1 – Define the issue:  Listen & Seek Understanding (Seek First to Understand before being Understood)

#2 – Decide how important the issue is?

#3 – Do you need to apologize or ask for forgiveness? I was wrong.  I am sorry.  Please forgive me.  This isn’t always easy if we haven’t had it [...]